10,000 Bad Lines

Hello everyone! Long time no…write or read I guess! I hope you are all doing well. I thought it would be good to give you an update on how I am feeling about my final piece of writing for the Bunbury Banter Young Playwrights Programme Showcase. Please take this opportunity to go and make yourself a nice cuppa (or a refreshing glass of something cold if you prefer) and listen to my ramblings.

As some of you might have figured out by now, I tend to overthink things. One thing that preoccupies my thinking is the fear of handing in my next draft because it might be awful. However recently when thinking about my final piece I came to a sudden realisation that hit me like an ice-cold brick:

My piece is actually going to be performed…like with real people in it. And…real people…actually watching it.

I always thought about how nervous I was handing my work away to someone to read. I find it a very vulnerable thing as I’m always waiting for negative feedback. What if someone doesn’t like it? What if they think it’s awful and rubbish? What if they laugh at me for even thinking I could write something like this? Not that this would ever happen with the wonderful Bunbury Banter team – these are just irrational thoughts of mine!

Being serious for a minute though, I’m scared. I’m scared about what people will think of my piece. It’s vulnerable enough giving your work to someone you trust, but the thought of someone seeing your work with no knowledge of how far you’ve come or what you are trying to achieve is terrifying. I’ve been getting worried about how my work will come across, and fearful that people may not understand it.

It's interesting, Erin…but I didn’t really get it. What’s the point?

Well, after a lot of thought (and many cups of chocolate digestive tea – yes that is a thing and it’s incredible!), I have come to the conclusion that these fears are not what is important right now. I have enjoyed the Young Playwrights Programme so much and that is what my final piece is about. It’s about embracing my love for playwrighting and using what I have learned to create something that I am proud of. And you know what? That’s a pretty amazing opportunity to have.

I’m excited to show people what I can do, and I’m excited to see what the future holds!

There’s a quote by Walt Stanchfield that says:

“We all have 10,000 bad drawings in us. The sooner we get them out the better.”

I would like to alter that ever so slightly for me and confidently say that I have 10,000 bad lines in me, and the sooner I get them out the better. So, if you’re reading this and putting something off because you’re scared, take this as a huge hug from me to go for it! Me…I’ll be practising what I preach. I’m away to write some more…and let’s see what comes out!

See you soon!

Erin Craighead

Erin is part of the Bunbury Banter Young Playwrights Programme 2020-2021